Understanding Realtor-ese!

Why don’t realtors use plain language to advertise their listings?  How are we to be able to translate what they write so that we know what a home really has to offer?

The first step in selling a home is marketing that home, and sometimes the brutal truth is just not going to attract a buyer.  We figure that if we can at least get you to explore the possibilities, that there is a chance of a sale.  “Cozy” sounds much more appealing than “small”, “motivated seller” is less alarming than “the seller needs a sale now” and “awaits your vision” is far more intriguing than “this place needs a complete overhaul.”  I’ve included a translation guide to some of our more popular phrases to aid you in understanding “realtor-speak” as you peruse our listings!

• Complete Renovation: the home has had a top to bottom overhaul and nearly everything is new within the past few years
• Mature Landscaping: large trees, but it could border on overgrown
• Secluded: there is no one anywhere to be found
• Historic: old, with windows that don’t open, don’t stay open, don’t shut or don’t lock
• Original: everything is at least 50 years old
• Investment Opportunity: you’re going to need to gut this one to the studs
• Needs TLC – another complete rehab needed
• Custom Window Treatments: early 90s, expensive, teal or rose colored draperies
• Must see Inside: zero curb appeal
• Bonus Room – no one knows what to do with this space
• One Car Garage – you might get your Suburban in, but forget about opening the doors once inside
• Up & Coming Neighborhood – this home is next to the train tracks
• Desirable Neighborhood – you’ll be paying more for this house because people love the neighborhood
• As Is – inspect before making your offer – the seller won’t be fixing anything
• Unique – you might have a hard time reselling this one
• Close to the Village – a 10 minute drive by car
• Walk to Village Shops – might be possible, but who has time?